So this is week two of my spiritual awakening…hmmm not really sure if that’s what it is. Maybe more of a me finding me process. Me being more comfortable being me process. There is one person that I truly miss talking to on a daily basis, but we’ve managed to keep some sort of contact and that’s really all that I can handle right now. Nothing to do with anyone, this right here, is all about me and mini me. But really more about me. It funny how when you stop talking you realize how much shit you really used to talk…lmao. Since i’m not really talking to anyone these days, the thoughts have to stay in my head and I guess for the most part, its better that way.
This old goat at my job, pissed me off over a week ago and i’m trying to find that place in my heart to just move on, but what she did was pretty much to throw me under the bus and I just can not go back there, at least not right now. Since at this moment the only thing that would help me is to cuss her stink and dutty and i’m trying to not to that on the man’s job, imma keep not talking to her until the feeling to cuss passes me by. I just hope that God helps me with this process…maybe after thanksgiving might be a good time to ease back…we shall see.
I have to admit that going thru this process has been good for me, if you know me, if you read my blog, well more so if you know me, you know that i should have done this a long time ago. People around me, friends family have felt for years that they could just talk to me any old which way as though I don’t have feelings. To that I say, i accept my part in that behavior, because if I would have nipped shit in the bud years ago. Therefore, until i can figure out the proper way to deal with certain ppl in certain situations, i just need to continue to do me. Which honestly has not been much of anything. Work, home, gym, hanging with mini me. But i guess to not have additional outsiders yapping in my ears has truly helped. I no longer feel as anxious, i still have sleep issues, but that’s just how that part of my life will be. I just need to continue working on figuring out what makes me happy and stick to that, because obvisouly everyone else around me does it and i get the shit end of the stick.
well…until next time
Oh yeah, I have been feeling for steaks on a daily basis for the last month, the feeling wont go away. Someone told me once about omaha steaks and i just ordered some, man oh man i can’t wait for them to come. Hopefully they come before thanksgiving so that I can eat one on turkey day as I am once again thankful to have the day off and to be just chilling at home….all alone in my PJ’s
